Wannabe Martha

Still trying to figure out which Martha

Where Is My Daughter And Who Left The Changeling In Her Place?

on October 30, 2015

I send the child who has lived with me her entire life (all 16 years) to go pick up the Halloween candy.

One honking hour later (did she travel to outer Mongolia?) she comes back with 4 ginormous bags of candy.  Not a single Reese’s PBC in the entire lot!  Not one.

“Whose child are you?” I ask.

“What’s the problem, Mama?”

“Do you see any Reese’s here?”

“Um that bag has the Pieces, so like, yeah.”

“I repeat – whose child are you?  No child of mine would think those loathsome things have any remote connection to a PBC!”

“Like, I’m totally helping you out, Mama.  This way you can, like, enjoy Halloween without temptation.  You should, like, be thanking me.”

I swear, it’s a freakin’ miracle that child still has breath in her body.

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10 responses to “Where Is My Daughter And Who Left The Changeling In Her Place?

  1. Mrs. C says:

    Oh come on! It’s not Halloween or Christmas or Valentine’s Day or Easter without the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups. What are you going to do with this strange girl who is living with you? I grabbed three bags myself yesterday and they were NOT for handing out. DH filled my stocking last year from top to toe with RPC. He’s a good, good man. LOL

  2. donalgraeme says:

    She could be possessed, you know. Perhaps you should contact your pastor about setting up an exorcism. I mean, there has to be something supernatural going on if she didn’t get any peanut butter cups.

  3. hearthie says:

    I haven’t bought any candy at all…

    Of course we’ll be at church when the non-existent ToTers wander by. 😀

  4. OMG, Halloween = Reese’s! That’s the only candy I bought this year. 🙂

  5. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    I think this means more Snickers bars for me. Yum! Every year, I have trouble picking a costume. I wonder what I’ll be this year? Maybe, I’ll go out with my buddies.

  6. LOL. That’s what happens when you delegate to a child.

  7. Elspeth says:

    Look at it as a Divine intervention. She removed the temptation. Although,..she IS old enough to know that Resse’s Pieces are not a substitute for PB cups. Weak, weak excuse.

    We did get trick or treaters. You wanna hear something really sad? There were parents driving their kids around in a van from house to house!

  8. Maeve says:

    Well, Halloween has come and gone. We had mobs of little princesses and superheroes. Totally adorable. There is no candy left. Actually (and I’ll completely deny it to her face), Iseult did me a huge favor by buying stuff I don’t actually care about. It’s not that I’m an extreme candy person, but put a PBC in front of me, and I’ll kill you if you get between it and me.

    Le Sigh.

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